Interim

In the past six years I haven't lived in the same place for longer than 9 months at a time.  This makes me crazy.  I was the child when coming home from vacation I would go up and physically hug our house.  Now, I'm nomadic.  My friends are scattered everywhere.  My paychecks are inconsistent at best.  Don't even get me started on where all of my clothes are.    

This mentality has been affecting my current ministry.  I'm serving in yet another internship.  Yet another 10 week period to invest and leave.  It's been a loving and supportive community.  But I find myself often confused about what I'm doing.  Where am I?  What is my purpose?

At least my Philosophy major is finally coming in handy.  I'm more than adequately equipped to wrangle these sorts of existential questions.

But thinking of myself as an interim and sensing that my future ministry might hold more of the same also puts what I care about into sharper focus.  I value the connections I make because I always have this sense that they might be fleeting.  I appreciate a really good home-cooked meal.  Don't even get me started on how marvelous it is when all of my family gets together.

My supervisor has repeatedly reminded me that as pastors we're all interims at the end of the day.  The church will never begin or end with me.  This only reinforces another piece of advice I got from a very wise mentor.  No matter what I do, I cannot absolutely take down the church.  It's been here for 2000 years and will not be thwarted by my plans.  This keeps me humble.  It also keeps me from believing that I have the great, new idea that will change everything.  Maybe I'll change something.  But everything seems unlikely.  In that sense, being an interim is an honored calling.

Although it would be nice to have the same address for 365 consecutive days.